Welcome to Discovering the Male Mysteries with Mel Mystery. This blog is a supplement to my podcast is for and about gay and bi pagan men. My podcasts are about what it is to be gay, what it is to be pagan, what it is to be men — sometimes as separate topics and sometimes all meshed together as one. I started this endeavor after seeing that there were few, if any, podcasts out there on this topic. The podcasts are informative, and present topics that challenge conventional thinking.

Author Archive

Episode 15 of my podcast is out!!!

My latest podcast is out: http://www.melmystery.com/

This one is a review of my experience at Between the Worlds last month.

 

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When the Doctor was Me

I’ve been a long-time fan of Doctor Who since long before it was cool.  I started watching the adventures of the 4th Doctor back when I was 9 or 10 years old in the late 1970s.  I followed him through his 5th, 6th, and 7th incarnations and also at some point caught up on Doctors 1 through 3.  When the show went off the air, I followed the Doctor’s adventures through books and audio adventures.  I watched the 8th Doctor’s television movie in 1996, and have followed every episode of the show since it’s revival in 2005.  Doctor Who and one other show, Knight Rider, were defining and pivotal shows of my youth that have forever had an impact on my life and values.  Doctor Who fights injustice wherever he goes.  He doesn’t use guns, but uses knowledge, intellect, and technology instead.  Knight Rider was similar in its own way – fighting injustice with intellect and technology rather than guns.

When I saw Sunday’s announcement that the upcoming Doctor will be a woman, I’ll just be honest and say I have mixed feelings.  I’m not in the camp that the Doctor shouldn’t be a woman at all, but I’m also not in the camp that the Doctor should be female solely in the interests of diversity and representation either.  I fall somewhere in the middle.  I don’t feel that everyone against a female doctor is a misogynist bro-flake.  In fact, some of my female friends also have mixed feelings about the Doctor being a woman.  I don’t think everyone who wants a female Doctor is a left-wing, radical, hippie extremist either.  I think some women want a Doctor who can be their own role model.  As a male, I’ve experienced what it’s like for the Doctor to be like “me,” and I know many women want to have the same experience. The same could be said for folks of other ethnicities and backgrounds looking for regenerational representation.

The reasons for my mixed feelings are complex.  Doctor Who has always been male and essentially British.  In the classic series, the Timelords were portrayed as stuffy, traditional, and sexless, so the idea of them changing gender seems a bit of a stretch to me.  It’s only been since Missy showed up a few seasons ago that we even got the idea that Timelords could regenerate into the other sex.  I was actually rooting for her to be the Rani, a strong female villain Timelady who showed up a few times in the classic series.  The Rani was a good character on her own, so why not take her character and run with it instead of taking a classically male character and turning him into her.  In my own opinion, Missy would have worked much better as the Rani – everything from the life-after-death experiments from Season 8 to the fact that her character was more amoral than outright evil.  The Doctor himself while being of the male gender, has mostly been portrayed as sexless, being above relationships and sexuality – whether by choice, temperament, or necessity.  Sure there was once that fling with that Aztec woman in his first incarnation, the 8th Doctor’s kiss with Grace in the television movie, and many of the new companions such as Rose, Martha, and Amy have had crushes on the Doctor, but time and time again he’s deflected focus away from his own sexuality.  There was also that dance between the 9th Doctor and Captain Jack. In the series, I’ve enjoyed a number of strong female companions – Romana (a Timelady of equal stature to the Doctor), Ace, Donna, Amy, Riversong, and others.

So why exactly do so many people want the Doctor to be female? I think essentially it comes down to the Doctor being like “me.”  That’s also the reason so many folks want a female Doctor.  Many of the female fans want a Doctor they can relate to and can internalize as a part of themselves (not to mention cosplay). The same applies to fans of color or other demographics.  The Doctor’s regeneration has always been about change and about bringing in someone different (sometimes radically different) than the one before.   We balance out old with young, reserved with brash, serious with fun, humble with self-important, and so on and so forth.  In that tradition, it’s really not that big a stretch to replace male with female.

As much as I loved David Tennant and Matt Smith in the role, I’m actually glad they didn’t bring in yet another Tennant-Smith clone.  Those two Doctors were more alike than different, especially in the way they looked. That said, David Tennant, Matt Smith, and even Christopher Eccleston drew in a larger female audience to the show, and many of those young women weren’t interested in being the Doctor per se.  They wanted to date him.  I won’t lie.  As a gay man, I did my own swooning even though I never thought of the Doctor sexually or romantically in the classic series – Peter Davison maybe, but not so much the other Doctors.  As a man, the Doctor could be me.  As a gay man, the Doctor could also be that mysterious, handsome, heroic, and unavailable stranger I could crush on.  The same reasons attracted many young straight women who joined the fandom, but they couldn’t claim a male Doctor was like them.  Therein lies the problem.

When I saw the announcement for a female Doctor, my biggest fear is that I won’t be able to relate to her and also that many of the show’s straight male fans may have a harder time relating than I do.  If male viewers start turning off the show, will there be enough viewers to keep it going.  Also, will the many straight female viewers who called for a woman Doctor be disappointed that the Doctor is no longer crush worthy?  I know I will be, but the Doctor remaining male doesn’t guarantee this.  Look at the falling demographics under Peter Capaldi.  He wasn’t as sexy as his recent predecessors. Many of the women who liked Tennant and Smith and the borderline romantic relationships they had with their female companions tuned out under an older Doctor.  With a female Doctor, I hope we’ll at least have some cute male companions or go back to a larger TARDIS team that is both male and female.

The biggest problem to me isn’t whether the Doctor is male or female.  It’s why there’s such a call for him to be female, a person of color, etc.  For me on some level it just bothers me to start changing demographics on an iconic character.  It bothered me in the 2008 Knight Rider remake when they allowed KITT to transform into a truck.  I wasn’t bothered that the new KITT was a Ford Mustang and not a Pontiac Trans Am.  With a car, it really isn’t about race or gender, though I do have to point out that KITT has always been black. Changing types of car was fine for me, but there was something about KITT being able to change into an F-150 pickup that just felt wrong somehow. I have the same feelings about making Doctor Who a woman, or when they made Starbuck a woman in the new Battlestar Galactica.  To me, it was about taking an iconic character that I’d grown up with and making them into something they weren’t originally.  At the same time, I was pleasantly surprised by the all-female Ghostbusters remake, and I was able to totally crush on Chris Hemsworth’s “Kevin” character in a way I really didn’t feel about anyone in the original Ghostbusters cast.

As I was saying, the problem isn’t the gender or color of the Doctor, but why there are so few iconic and successful shows featuring female characters (or characters of color).  We had Buffy the Vampire Slayer, the Charmed Sisters, Xena, Wonder Woman, Captain Janeway, and Agent Carter, but I really haven’t been able to think of that many sci-fi and fantasy shows that were carried by a central female character.  The numbers are less when you start looking at spacefaring and time traveling heroines.  Of course, the gender of these strong female characters was an important part of their charm.  Buffy wouldn’t have been as strong or complex a character if she’d been male, Xena would have been just another sword and sandal warrior, the Halliwell sisters might not have cut it as brothers, and Wonder Woman wouldn’t be the same if she was a transgender male.

Instead of rewriting classic characters as someone of a different gender or color, why don’t we have more original female and ethnic characters leading their own shows?  I thought Star Trek did this wonderfully with Star Trek Voyager.  They didn’t remake Captain Kirk as a woman.  They created a new show in the Star Trek universe with a strong, original female lead.  I loved Voyager and Captain Janeway brought something to the franchise that wouldn’t be there if they’d simply recast Kirk as a woman.  Deep Space Nine brought in a strong African American lead in the form of Commander Sisko.  These characters added to the Star Trek universe and the unfolding Star Trek story in a way that recasting the original characters never could have done.  The same could be done in the Whoniverse.  I’d love to see the adventures of Romana in her own TARDIS, or what about Riversong, Clara and Me in their stolen TARDIS, or some of the other new series companions, or even classic series companions. I loved the Sarah Jane Adventures.  Could something similar, but unique in its own right, be done with other female companions?

Regardless of the gender, race, age, or other characteristics of the Doctor, I will continue to watch the show and give each new actor / actress the chance to win me over.  I’m looking forward to seeing what the new Doctor and the new producer bring to Doctor Who.  Hopefully it will be something good.

Mel and Peter Davison

I once met Peter Davison, the 5th Doctor, at a sci-fi conference.


My next big project – a campground resort?

I want to take a moment to announce what I hope will be my next big project. For a long time, I’ve been contemplating the idea of starting a campground of some type.  I’ve often thought it might be a retirement project, but I’ve become more and more compelled to make it a reality sooner.  Perhaps it’s dissatisfaction with my current day-to-day job, the call (or perhaps crisis) of midlife, feelings of deep loss after my mom sold my childhood home, the desire to get back to living in a rural area closer to nature, or some combination of the above.  Whatever the reasons, I’ve decided to embark on the journey to making this dream of a campground a reality.  I’m still in the early stages, and don’t know entirely whether the dream will be achieved, but I know it’s the direction I want to be heading.

Over the past year, I’ve been researching LGBTQ, Pagan, and even a few other types of campgrounds; I’ve formulated a business plan; and I’ve created a web page to mark the start of the project and to track its progress, as well as to start building an interested community. The first major milestone will be purchasing land and relocating.  I hope to do this within the next year or two, and will also need to find a new job in the new town to hold me over until the campground opens.  The likely location will be somewhere in central Virginia.  I’ll be looking for a second business partner to help found and run the business.  Things really won’t get moving in a big way until after the land purchase.  At that point, I’ll be looking for investors and other sources of start-up finances to build the rest of the campground.  I’ll also be looking for campground members and outside groups looking to host gatherings there. I’m hoping the campground itself could open within the next 3-5 years.

My concept uses many of the gay and bi men’s campground resorts already out there as a base, but merges those with other communities such as Pagans, and some adult lifestyle communities.  While gay and bi men, and Pagan men will likely be the base audiences, other adult audiences would be welcome regardless of sexual orientation, gender, etc.  This will be a membership-based adult campground resort.  I hope to host a variety of theme weekends and even a handful of gatherings. I’d also open up the campground to outside conferences and gatherings.  I’d like to create an open air Pagan / Hellenistic temple that could host drum circles and solar / lunar celebrations and rituals.

I wanted to take a moment to announce the start of the project, but I also look forward to input, advice, etc.  If anyone is interested in helping this dream become a reality; if you think you might be interested in becoming the second business partner (or know someone who would be interested); if you think you might want to become a future investor once I get to that stage; if you think you might want to become a member, camper, or host a gathering there; if any of these things intrigues you, please visit my website for the campground and feel free to contact me with your ideas or to be put on the mailing list.

The website is: www.olympuscampgroundresort.com

Thanks,

Mel


Latest podcast now available — Episode 14: The Update Show

In episode 14: The Update Show, I provide updates on what I’ve been up to including:

  • Conferences and gatherings – The Hero’s Adventure, Querent, and Between the Worlds
  • Updates on my book and an LGBT werewolf workshop I’m hoping to do at Marscon
  • My photography
  • My local LGBTQ / Pagan / Alternative website
  • Activism
  • Groups including the New Order of Chaeronea and Order of the Stone Circle
  • My big project – I’m working toward starting a campground / retreat center
  • Personal updates

You can find my show on my website: http://www.melmystery.com, and through iTunes and Podbean.


Green is Gay

You may have heard the expression in school never to wear green on Thursday because that makes you a “queer” or a “fairy”. What seems like a cruel made up children’s game to identify gay people actually underscores a long history of the color green being associated with gay men.

The term “fairy” has long been a term used to identify gay men. Its use has been largely derogatory, but some gay men have reclaimed it. In the book, Another Mother Tongue: Gay Words, Gay Worlds, by Judy Grahn, the author points out that green was the primary color worn by mythical fairies, and this connection ties into this tradition. The fairies have freer sexual morals than Christian cultures are comfortable with. In fact, given their extremely long, perhaps even immortal lives, the idea of eternal marriage and coupledom would only give way to boredom. So homosexual bonds were likely to have been acceptable. The color green is a useful color for mythical fairies because it helps them to blend in and remain hidden in their natural environment among the plants and trees.

As for the connection with Thursday, Thursday was considered by some to be “Fairy Day”. There is an additional connection to Thursday with medieval witches. When questioned under torture about their practices, some witches confessed that they practiced different sexual rites on different nights, and Thursday was the night associated with homosexual rites.

But the association with the color green and homosexuals goes back even further. Cassell’s Encyclopedia of Queer Myth, Symbol and Spirit has more to say on the color green.  At Ephesus, the transgender and often homosexual priests of the goddess Artemis / Diana wore garments of scarlet, violet, saffron, and yellow-green. In ancient Rome, green and especially yellow-green was associated with male gender variance and especially the passive role in male homosexual acts. These men were called galbinati, and are mentioned in Martial’s Epigrams. Martial talks about how these soft, effeminate men garbed in green lie on purple couches while being fanned by other men using red feathers. It sounds like the good life to me, but Martial criticizes their morality as being quote “grass-green.”

In pre-Modern France, bisexual and homosexually inclined courtiers called mignons wore green as the primary color in their tights, along with yellow or red. Often one leg of their tights would be green and the other yellow, and they might have a red cape. Their costumes were derived from three sources — the costumes of traditional troubadours, the costumes of fools, and the costumes of the legendary fairies.

Because green was associated with the margins of society, it also became associated with heretics who carried a green cross in their ceremonies.

Green was also a signifier of homosexuality among British poets. The association of the color green with homosexuality survived into the 19th Century and may even have been reclaimed at that time. A green carnation was adopted as a kindred symbol by Oscar Wilde and the English Decadents, and during the same time a band of men in Paris wore a green cravat to signify their homosexual inclinations.

So as you can see, the color green has a long history of associations with homosexuality, fairies, and magick. Wear it proudly — especially on Thursdays.


Liberal Bubbles, Political Correctness, and Identity Politics: Finding the Middle Ground

I consider myself fairly left of center when it comes to social issues. I believe in LGBTQ rights and sexual freedom.  I believe that people of color face systematic oppression and that should be fixed.  I believe women deserve equal pay and equal opportunities to men.  I don’t believe it’s my choice, the government’s, or anyone else’s whether a woman has an abortion.  I also believe that teaching sex education in the schools would prevent not just abortions, but the spread of STD’s.  I believe folks’ religious beliefs should be respected regardless of religion (so long as those beliefs aren’t predatory or used to put down or oppress others).   I believe marijuana is no more harmful to society than alcohol and should be legalized.  I believe that most porn is okay and that sex work and sex workers should be given legitimacy so long as we’re talking consensual adults. I believe in “reasonable” gun control measures. I also believe that the working class should be given a break and that the super-rich should be taxed more.  I believe that small local businesses should be held to different standards than large national and international corporations.

I don’t relate to the idea of a liberal bubble as has been put out recently in the media, but I believe there are some at the extreme left who are out of touch with reality.  I believe the same about folks on the extreme right.  There are liberal bubbles, conservative bubbles, urban bubbles, rural bubbles, religious bubbles, and so on and so forth. I think most of us surround ourselves with people of similar beliefs and interests.  I also think that it’s human nature for us all to tend to watch news that supports our own biases and to balk at news that challenges our beliefs about the world. The problem with bubbles is that we lose touch with the needs of those who aren’t like us, if we even understood them to begin with.  The rural dweller who has never experienced being the victim of a hate crime is clueless about why there’s so much animosity against the rebel flag, just as an urban socialite is clueless about the deep rooted affiliation a rural Southerner has toward the same flag.  Many against the transgender bathroom issue are truly afraid of sharing the same bathroom, but what they don’t realize is that transgender folks are afraid too.  What we need to be doing is looking for solutions that are fair to all and that break down the fears and biases we have against each other.

President Obama recently remarked on the concept of “political correctness.”  (http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/obama-suspect-trumps-definition-political-correctness-mine/story?id=44274981).  This article underscores the deep division about what political correctness means.  Like Obama, I’ve always believed political correctness was about calling people what they want to be called, avoiding calling people derogatory names, showing courtesy and good manners to others, and being thoughtful that not everyone has the same background or beliefs as I do.  I grew up in the rural South and to me this doesn’t seem a far stretch from the concept of good old-fashioned Southern manners.  There’s this idea that you may not like the person you are talking to, but you treat them with courtesy and respect (at least publically).  Of course, for conservatives, “political correctness” is a code word for hypersensitivity and a feeling of victimization among minority groups. It doesn’t matter that minority groups are systematically oppressed in our culture, and maybe they have legitimate reason to be sensitive about being treated badly or being called certain names. Somehow they should be quiet about it and not get upset when it happens. Ironically, many on the right are also hypersensitive and cry discrimination and victimhood whenever someone challenges their beliefs.  Religious fundamentalists are especially prone to crying “persecution” such as when they are expected to bake wedding cakes for same-sex couples.

According to Dictionary.com “Identity Politics” is “political activity or movements based on or catering to the cultural, gender, racial, religious, or social interests that characterize a group identity.”  Conservatives seem to see this as only applying to liberals who rally around minority identities such as race, gender, sexual orientation, and so forth, but the truth is most politics are based in large part on the beliefs one has based in their identity. The coal miner’s identity is based (at least to some extent) on their job and the values and norms of others with the same job.  Rural Southerners have a group identity built on guns and the Rebel flag (among other things). Christians see Christianity not just as a set of beliefs, but part of their identities.  The list goes on. For most LGBTQ people, our identities necessitate rallying against anti-gay policies and laws.  People of color fight against racism. Many women fight for gender equality, because… guess what… it affects them. Many people have multiple identities and roles, so that’s why sometimes you see a gay Republican or a liberal Redneck (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTHsQd-vRXK1bp4vpifl6yA) .

Conservatives can be quick to label and shame, but so can we.  I’ve been reading a lot of liberal media sites (especially since the election).  While I’m in agreement with most of what is put forth on these sites, I have seen a disturbing tendency from some corners to quickly label folks as racist, misogynistic, or homophobic for holding differences of opinion and in some cases for being the wrong identity.  I’ve seen white Liberal allies labeled as racist with little or any real justification.  I’ve seen gay men and masculinity in general labeled as misogynistic and anti-woman for wanting to spend time among other men.  Sure sometimes opinions and actions are built on hateful beliefs and unjustified biases.  Other times you have people trying to live their lives, find the middle ground, or who mean well but just don’t have a full grasp of the issues. When we call out bigots for their racism, sexism, and homophobia, it’s often well justified.  When we start throwing around these terms all willy-nilly at ourselves and our allies who have a subtle difference of opinion, we might be turning off well-meaning people from our cause.  This also has an effect like crying “wolf.” If every minor thing triggers our name calling, it has less substance and impact when something major comes up that needs addressing.

Part of our challenge – especially in this new era of Trump – is to help folks understand (and agree with) our ideologies and not just our politics.   We also need to be looking at the middle ground and not the extremes. Political correctness and Southern manners may be very similar in many ways, but getting folks past political rhetoric, ideology, and even simple misconceptions takes work and a real desire to find solutions that work for all and not just the extremes. Most people who are against political correctness don’t really want to go out calling Black people the “N-word” or gay people the “F-word”.  Some do, but others have bought into the idea pushed by conservatives (and sometimes validated by liberals) that the “political correctness police” are out to punish them if they say the wrong thing, even a minor thing.  They feel they have to walk on eggshells or fear being shamed.  Many are afraid that if they call a Native American an “Indian” or an African-American “Black” they might be judged harshly even if they didn’t mean any harm. I will point out that many conservative Christians also get sensitive when you start talking about religion and they have their own brand of “political correctness” about what can and can’t be said about Christianity or their identities as Christians.   The bottom line is that we need to be looking for shared values of civility and respect beyond our politics. If we do this, we might make greater progress than trying to push the politics themselves.

When seeking solutions we need to look for solutions that respect the rights of all, but also their fears, and also the cross-section of where everyone’s differing identities and ideologies meet. The Confederate flag is part of the identities of many Southern Americans who feel it represents their heritage.  At the same time it is used as a symbol of many racists to promote their hateful cause.  There’s probably no easy solution to this one, but perhaps there’s some kind of middle ground on this issue.

Transgender folks, like everyone else, need to use the restroom.  They want to use the bathroom that conforms to their gender identity. They also risk being assaulted for using the “wrong” bathroom.  Many straight folks truly fear sharing the bathroom with trans folks and also fear that bathroom laws will open the way for predatory behavior, not necessarily from trans folks, but from unscrupulous people using bathroom policies as a loophole. I honestly think the best solution (at least short term) is for public facilities to have individual bathrooms for folks with special needs.  Many places already have individual bathrooms for disabled people; a number have “family” bathrooms which are basically unisex bathrooms anyway; so why not just extend their use to one more community.

Another issue that is often thrown about is why can minority groups celebrate their heritage or have special interest groups, but if someone from a majority group does so it’s shamed.  A prime example often given is that folks can celebrate Black heritage or Gay pride, but not White heritage or Straight pride.  While I think there is often more of a need among minority groups to celebrate their uniqueness in an often oppressive world, I don’t see why anyone should not be able to celebrate who they are as long as they are doing it in the spirit of history and heritage and not in the spirit of hate.  Often the “White heritage” and “Straight pride” groups form from a spirit of hate and mocking rather than to share a positive history or identity to the world.  Truth be told, there are a number of groups out there that do celebrate a mostly white or European heritage that don’t get shamed at all (at least not for celebrating their heritage).  Examples include Irish Americans celebrating their Irish heritage; Italian Americans celebrating all things Italia; and there’s an annual Greek festival in my area that highlights Greek food, music, and dancing.  These folks celebrate their unique foods and culture, not hating folks who aren’t white or who aren’t of their nationality.

It doesn’t always have to be all or nothing, sometimes the best solution is a compromise.  Later on when folks are comfortable with the compromise, additional adjustments can be made if desired or necessary.

One last thing I’d like to talk about before wrapping up is how conservatives often take our language or make up code words and twist the meaning against us.  I’ve already talked about how political correctness can be seen as either civility or oversensitivity.  I’ve also talked about how most everyone’s politics are based around their identities.  Conservatives have made these code words that they’ve twisted and injected with negativity.  I’d like to suggest in this age of Trump that we start calling out their identity politics and their own versions of political correctness.  We also shouldn’t fear not being “politically correct” when we call out racism, sexism, homophobia, xenophobia and the like in the Trump era. Just make sure it’s justified and make sure it counts!


We must be Vigilant

I woke up to the news of the 2016 Presidential Election results this morning with horror.  I was not the only one.  Many other LGBT folks, women, people of color, immigrants, Muslims, and other minorities have reacted with the same horror and a very real fear of what a Trump presidency might bring about.  Already bastions of hate and intolerance, including the KKK, the Alt Right movement, and other groups, have come out of the woodwork feeling validated by Trump’s rhetoric during his campaign and his unexpected election to President.

I rewind the clock to just under a year and a half ago when same-sex marriage was legalized in the U.S. by the Supreme Court decision on June 26, 2015.  As LGBTQ people we felt we had finally arrived.  Many LGBTQ advocacy organizations shut down claiming their work was done.  The average, mainstream gay or lesbian person became more interested in wedding planning than in activism.  Those already privileged in other areas of their life, ghosted themselves from coalitions and organizations of people fighting for other causes – women’s rights, the rights of people of color, trans rights, sex worker rights, religious tolerance, helping the poor, LGBTQ youth, homelessness, and many others. Once we received some semblance of rights, many of us didn’t care to continue fighting for the rights of others. Those issues were someone else’s problem not ours.

Up until a today, the biggest LGBTQ concern on most LGBTQ people’s minds was the Trans bathroom issue.  Little did we concern ourselves that the achievements we’ve made in the past decade could possibly come tumbling down. Progress only moves forward, right?  We have marriage equality, gays in the military, record numbers of LGBTQ characters on television, and droves of LGBTQ celebrities and even sports figures coming out of the closet or in support of LGBTQ folks.

The mass shooting at the Pulse Orlando nightclub last June was a shock and a wakeup call suggesting that prejudice still exists against LGBTQ folks, against people of color, and against Muslims, but did we really heed the call? Sure there were vigils and speeches and the forming of LGBTQ gun control groups, but a month or two later after the hubbub and after all the summer Pride festivals died down, how much have we really done to address the underlying issues that caused such a tragedy to happen in our country in the first place? How many of us have gotten involved in any kind of actual cause as a result of the tragedy?

LGBTQ folks are not the only ones who became complacent under the eight years of Obama’s presidency.  Many believed with an African-American serving as President, that racism was a thing of the past.  While we’ve never adopted the Equal Rights Amendment for women, many folks believed women’s rights were also secure.

With Trump’s election and his pending presidency, we live in fear.  Will he reverse same-sex marriage? Will he close down Planned Parenthood?  Will he deport immigrants and Muslims, and close the borders? Will he give huge tax breaks to the rich, while the poor get poorer? Do we really want someone that unstable to have control of military forces and of nuclear weapons?  Will he continue to incite the anger, hate, and divisiveness we saw in his campaign?

What about all the people who voted for him?  Does approximately half of the country really hate and look down on LGBT folks, people of color, women, immigrants, Muslims, and anyone else defined as other? Were they just reacting to calls for sensible gun control and political correctness?  Were they feeling frustrated and left out in a time when a number of minority groups celebrated increased visibility and increased rights? Could we really miss the subtle racism, sexism, xenophobia, and homophobia brewing just below the surface of American society?

While I’m not looking forward to a Trump presidency, I hope we as a people can learn from the circumstances we’re faced with.  Perhaps we will feel compelled to get involved, not just to secure our own rights, but to look out for others.  Maybe we will learn to work together among our different disenfranchised or potentially disenfranchised demographic groups.  Perhaps we’ll learn that an injustice to one group is an injustice for all. Perhaps the younger generations who grew up feeling they were totally accepted by society, will learn what the older generations already knew about prejudice and intolerance. Perhaps somehow they will become better people for it.  Perhaps all those who voted for Trump will realize their mistake, when the people they love – their friends, their neighbors, their co-workers, and their family members, start being affected by his policies.

It is a dark day, and we do not entirely know what a Trump presidency will bring us.  Until then, we must be vigilant. We must stand together and we must not go quietly into the night!